When we think about what attracts us to someone, more often than not, it simply boils down to confidence. Once you swipe right, and get past the shirtless selfie, and the shih tzu puppy attached to the photo, what factors actually attract you to that person enough for you to wash your hair, and leave your favorite Netflix series, mid-way, just to get a drink with a potential love interest?
Well, you could just be bored or wanting a free meal, but you’ll quickly realize whether or not someone will peak your interest. It’ll be easily displayed in the way an individual carries him or herself. It can be anything from witty jokes that make you spit up those garlic fries you know you shouldn’t have gotten on the first date, the use of full sentences or simply the way your date gazes directly into your eyes. It is an overall charm, and regardless of its manifestation, is usually a sign of confidence.
And confidence is attractive AF. If you think you are awesome, weirdly enough, everyone will too. Yes, you may feel fat because eating that whole pizza last night didn’t actually equate with solving world hunger. Maybe your job sucks, and you’ve been wanting to look for another one but it’s hard with sleep, squeezing in some type of work out and HH getting in the way (I say this from experience). But, if you put all that aside and remind yourself that you are still amazing and that you deserve only the best, you will be one step closer to success. You may not attract all of the opportunities you meditate on, for the first time, tomorrow morning, but you will feel great about yourself, about your day, and about the people around you. You will allow others to not only think of you, in that radiating light that you see yourself in, but you will inspire them to do the same.
However, there is also a difference between confidence and being an asshole. Confidence is just as much about loving yourself as it is about loving those around you. It is about accepting the flaws of others (as long as they don’t inhibit your well- being), and understanding that your light doesn’t stop shinning because someone else’s light is on full watt power. Being happy with who you are is a beautiful thing, and it is something that should be encouraged (amidst the self-deprecating memes we send our friends, because those are funny, and I am a full supporter of “get yourself a girl who can do both”).
I once had a friend that made me feel like I had to be “less than” just because she was unhappy with her life and my optimism was misconstrued for conceit. She shamed my self-assurance, and made me feel like I had to pretend to be miserable and self- loathing just to fit in. Her insecurity became something I inherited and it took a long time for me to remember to just be free; to lose my inhibitions and to just believe. And believing is key!
Remember when you were a kid and you literally danced like no one was watching? Mostly because no one was watching, except maybe those bears you lined up in size order. Still, remember when you screamed at your mom to watch you do that backflip in the pool, thinking you were basically an athletic genius? Or when you convinced your classmates you were best-friends with Nick Carter? (Ok, maybe that last one was just me, but you get my point). Channel your inner child, the one that thought you were a rock star- because guess what, (insert cheesy analogy) - you are, and the world deserves to see you in all your glory.
Everyone has their own sense of reality, so chose to hang out with people whose reality is similar to yours. Surround yourself with like-minded individuals who inspire you to be the best version of yourself (aka everyone at the LD family). There will always be negative influences in our paths but our friends shouldn’t be them. Get rid of any people in your life who negate your self- worth and walk away from those negative Nancies whispering “good riddance”. Invite people into your life who you not only respect, but those who are also driven, and who will empower you to follow suit.
Long story short-decide that you are a force not to be reckoned with today and always! Or at least before you even have your first vodka-soda. Take the day by the horns, make up your own analogies and never trust a girl who says she can’t have female friends.