Is 28 the new 21? – Use Carrie Bradshaw voice when reading title.
Sure, we thought we would all have incredible careers, be married and living in a mansion by 28, but most of us are just out here curing yesterday's hangover, with another drink that we promised ourselves we wouldn’t have. Yes, this is autobiographical and yes, today was rough, but in my defense I am writing an article claiming to basically be 21.
I woke up recently and thought, fuck, I’m getting older. Like the older that I thought I would have “everything figured out by”, and then I looked around and realized most of my friends didn’t have their shit together either, and I thought phew, I’m not alone. I say all this in the most sincere way. It’s not that any of us are at home all day watching reality TV (I only do that on Mondays, ok?) It’s just that life gets in the way, and it’s never as easy, as bam, you are successful and have everything you want. Unless of course you’re an insta model with ten million followers.
If it’s around the time of your high school reunion, and you haven’t found your perfect person, or ideal job, chances are, you are not the only one. This month alone, three of my friends have parted with their significant others, one of them cancelling a wedding. It’s hard to start over when your twenties are fading and your facebook is bombarded with engagement posts, but you may have to let go of the archetype. I was in a relationship for four years that I definitely thought would end in marriage, so I know first hand that it’s hard to part with that picturesque dream and start over. There are changes that you can still make and must make in order to be happy and true to yourself, even if it means being a little selfish.
Similarly, if you are still single and are desperately hoping your bumble date is the one- maybe they are (I can use they now, because I don’t know how anyone identifies and because it’s also easier than saying he or she all the time). Allow yourself to meet people without the gravity of time and pressure. An LA Times article recently reported that “55.8% of the population in LA is single” with NYC being a close second with “53.6%”, so there are still plenty of polluted fish to go around. And if you don’t live in one of those cities, maybe grandma really does know a nice young, man. Go on, give it a try. Not hating on all other areas, or grandmas. Plus, if you are still single you have so much opportunity to focus on yourself and your future. Believe me, once you are in a relationship, you will have little time to do anything but cuddle and talk about your day, so give yourself a fair chance while you can.
Now, if you are in a great relationship, or just choosing to be awesomely single, but don’t have your dream job- you are once again in the company of many. I’m an actress, which means my night job is currently serving at a restaurant. It’s cliché for a reason. Many of us move to different places chasing a dream, and unfortunately, some dreams don’t come true instantly. Living in LA, I’m surrounded by friends who are entrepreneurs, have businesses, and/or following their passions. Passions often can’t come true without some side income. Other times, you don’t fucking know what you want to do with your life yet, and that’s ok too. You will figure it out, I promise.
This also goes out to all my nine to fivers. I know that some of you don’t love your current work place either, and that’s ok. You always have the opportunity to try something different. Don’t wait till you really are old. If you feel the happiest at your job looking at memes, try something different. I know it’s easy for me to sit here and preach something I may be guilty of myself (because I definitely know that being comfortable is a lot easier to do) but I just hope I inspire you a little. I’m here to offer advice, and sometimes it's advice I also need to take.
What it comes down to is, age is really just a number, or so they say. 21, 40, 25, 27.5, 34. We are all still figuring it all out. I want to celebrate how much we have already accomplished and how much we still have to offer, regardless of the number attached to us. And, if you are someone who feels like they kind of have it all, you are one lucky son of a bitch. Kudos to you- you are the #goals, and it's people like you that remind us that it really is possible to have it all.
If you still feel slightly sad about aging, remember we are all going to die sometime, and your younger friends may even die before you. I’ll try to remind myself of all of this in just a few days, when I start non-stop complaining about being old on my birthday.